Scribblin'

I know it's been said before, but life seems to be one big test. A test on whether or not you can deal with the pressure. The pressure being, of course, of the test.
It seems like some people always 'live for the night', then just push through the day, until another good time, or 'night'. Me, however, I push for a different kind of night. The nights I live for gain a certain measure of respect from me, and that's about all I can say about them, because what makes them the 'nights' for me, is that they're indescribable. It's not the usual drink, party, have a good time kinda night that I remember, although those are great. The kind I remember are the one's where something happens that gets me to thinking, and when the thinking results in a step forward, or I figure out something important in my life's path, then the night is memorable. Tonight made me realize that I'm already at a phase where I want to go and take back certain things in my life, or redo it. Already. It just doesn't seem like a good thing to be wishing for already, I mean, I'm only 18. I can't even imagine what I'll feel like when I'm 25 or 30. What kind of stress will I be dealing with then? Will I be able to handle it? I sure fucking hope so. I just hope I get my shit together, choose my major completely, get a good fucking job, and just be set. Although that kind of life sounds possibly mediocre, it's not that. I don't want just a mediocre life, being a basic middle class citizen. I want, just like everybody else, to be well set. If I'm not well set, then I doubt I'll be happy. I know money can't buy happiness, but more money can result in less stress, and that's something worth buying. Wale's back-up singers are pretty good. That's it for now though, I think.