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If you want to really read these blogs, start from the bottom. The top is the most recent, but the bottom is where you'll get the most depth and insight to how I write.

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

You were the one I always tried to draw, Baby you're the only light I ever saw

I don't even want to write anymore, but I know it's good for me.
I need a topic, besides depression and loneliness. Pessimism helps avert troubles and hurdles, but also proves for super nostalgia and a tad too much of paranoia.

I need to do something with this writing. My writing. Any writing. I'm getting nowhere just complaining and voicing my subpar opinions of the late teenager observing the world from a monotonous suburbia. I need something to write about. I need somebody to give me something to write about, without telling me. Inspiration, give me it. I dare you.

I did develop a crazy theory on sound the other day though.
Just say you have something that weighs a million pounds. If its bottom, or base, or whatever touches the ground when it sets, is a square mile, and the object were somehow lifted up and dropped, it would be loud, would it not?
It would.

But what if that same million pound object had a base that was as tiny as the tip of a needle. It's possible to get something that massive to balance on something that small, especially in a vacuum. So if the same object had a base of a needle-head, and was dropped and the only thing that hit the ground was the needle-head, with this million pound object on top of it, how loud would it be? any sound at all? I can't see a needle-head exerting any sort of sound except for a ting or something insignificant.


This powerful loneliness is getting ridiculous. It's almost as if the longer I go alone, the stronger I get as a person, or mentally, but as soon as I find somebody that I can either talk with or be with or whatever it may be, I go weak. I go numb. I become a subject to my own power, and the power presses me towards the person. I either need somebody that pulls away just as fast and hard as I push towards them or somebody that can push me back harder and show me something I've never seen, or felt.
I'm eager for it either way.

maybe top this off later.

topping off:
SO it's either ROTC at mizzou, eh, become a lawyer and hate my job but make bank, eh, or continue with this computer informations bullshit and just be a drone and contributor to computers eventually running the world.
Or a Computer Lawyer in the Army :D
fucking lawyers... takin that mesothelioma money and shit.